Matthew Schlukebier

Blog: December 2004.

Happy New Year!

Another year ends; another begins.

Well, that’ a wrap, everyone! Our final episode of 2004 is just around the corner and then the next season, 2005, is set to begin. 365 more episodes of “Life” are on the way! Talk about long lasting reality series! (Okay, so that sentence was funnier when I typed it…)

Everyone, have a great holiday and party hard on New Year’s Eve! More bloggin’ to come!

Posted: 29 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

Shields up, Captain?

Using fields of force to accomplish goals in space …

Posted: 27 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

Christmas carols

How Low Can You Go?

“Beware of phony collection boxes”

From the Minneapolis StarTribune:

Do not, we repeat, do not put your spare change inside red wooden or clear plexiglass boxes with stickers bearing the Salvation Army logo or a picture of a missing little boy with brown hair.

They’re phony.

A 43-year-old Hopkins woman is in police custody for her apparent role in a donation fraud scheme. She was arrested Monday night at an Eagan liquor store after employees discovered that the Salvation Army was not receiving donations from boxes that had been at the store for more than a month.

Why, why!, do you need to be so low?

Posted: 22 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

The Art and Science of Stupid Questions

SitePoint Tribute article

The Art and Science of Stupid Questions

“I don’t mean to be rude, but some people are so stupid it’s almost beyond comprehension!”

That’s not me talking; it’s a comment for one of my team who provides customer service for one of our ecommerce sites. This outline reflects the sales process on the site.

  1. The visitor comes to the site. The first subheading on the site says, “Allow 14 working days for shipping.”
  2. At each point through the order process we say, “Allow 14 working days for shipping.”
  3. If the visitor actually orders, the shopping cart tells them to “Allow 14 working days for shipping.”
  4. Upon completion of the order, the visitor is taken to a page that says, “Thanks for your order. Please allow 14 working days for shipping.”
  5. A series of 5 autoresponders starts immediately. The first thing the first autoresponders says is, “Allow 14 working days for shipping.”
  6. Every autoresponder mentions the shipping time as — you guessed it — 14 working days.

Simple, right? Wrong! In practice, here’s what happens.

The visitors order the product. They then email us and ask, “How long will this product take to be delivered?"”

That happens with 18% of orders.

Another 6% of customers waits 3-4 days, then emails us to ask, “How long will this product take to be delivered?”

In total, 27% of our customers email us to ask, “How long will this product take to be delivered?”

Idiots… read!

Web Links [12-15-2004]

Here is a mass collection of links to information, news and other miscellaneous stuff that I have run across in the last week or so. Some of it is interesting for all, some of it is interesting just for me.

Miscellaneous

News stories

Science

What is causing all of this fighting between evolution and “intelligent design” in the schools? Is this the fault of the minority, republicans? Maybe; maybe not. But, whomever it is — knock it off.

… What makes evolution so worthy of such special attention? Something is going on that does not make sense.

Michael Zimmerman, dean of the College of Letters and Science (University of Wisconsin-Oshkosh)

Software/Internet

A Last Word about WCAL

Clip from SaveWCAL e-mail

In other news, we were informed yesterday that at least two members of St. Olaf’s 50th Reunion Committee have resigned over the sale of WCAL. One of the resignations letters is available for download at: http://www.savewcal.org/pdf/doering.pdf

… if SaveWCAL were sure that every possible effort had been exhausted, we would tell you that openly and honestly. I once again say to you, “It is not over, and there is still work to be done.” Stay tuned!

Ruth Sylte ‘82, President

St. Olaf College is still not paying attention. However, the sale for WCAL is to be finalized today. I’m sure an e-mail will be out from SaveWCAL tonight letting us know that. But thanks to their efforts MPR has had to fight for this, and they will have to pay as well:

Today [December 9, 2004], the St. Paul City Council, acting in its role as the St. Paul Housing and Redevelopment Authority (HRA), reconsidered a $22 million request from Minnesota Public Radio intended to finance the acquisition of WCAL/KMSE and improve and enlarge the MPR headquarters. The HRA approved the $10 million part of the request for the building project, but rejected $12 million for the purchase of WCAL/KMSE and their assets. This afternoon’s action reverses a November HRA decision to approve the entire MPR proposal.

Posted: 15 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

Book Signing

Doug’s Rooms: Transforming Your Space One Room at a Time

I broke down and swung by the Mall of America (Bloomington, Minnesota) to get a signed copy of the new book, Doug’s Rooms, by Doug Wilson (a designer on TLC’s Trading Spaces). Normally, I rarely collect signatures of famous personalities, but this seemed like too good of an opportunity to miss.

I am quite a fan of Trading Spaces & Trading Spaces: Family, as well as, While You Were Out, and In a Fix. And, I watch them far too often on some weekends. (Especially of late, since I have been looking for some good ideas for my home.) Some of the designs that Doug has done on Trading Spaces have been quite unique and interesting, so I figured since I am in the process of remodeling my home, I could use any help I could get! And, since I would likely never have the opportunity to be on the show, this was a good chance to meet him. Now, if only Amy Wynn Pastor and Paige Davis would come to town too …

Related links:

More News & Links

Here’s a story worth reading:

Sometimes, a piece of soggy cereal is just a piece of soggy cereal. Unless, of course, it’s a piece of soggy cereal bearing an uncanny resemblance to history’s most beloved extraterrestrial, E.T.

That’s the image Australian graphic designer Chris Doyle spotted when he gazed into his bowl of Kellogg’s Nutri-Grain one morning. Instead of phoning home, the 27-year-old graphic designer fished out the strangely shaped flake, had it lacquered and put it up for sale on eBay.

More than 40 offers poured in from around the world, most from one bidder. The bidding opened at $16, according to the Associated Press, and closed late Tuesday at $1,035. Doyle did not reveal the identity of the victor.

The cereal sale follows last week’s eBay sale of a 10-year-old, partly eaten grilled-cheese sandwich said to bear an image of the Virgin Mary. The crusty relic went for $28,000.

Related links:

More informative & useful links:

Posted: 04 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

Blue Mars

Well, now we know there was water — but was there life?

Posted: 02 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

Election Day Reforms

Couldn’t think of it before the election?

Well, it’s about time. Just too bad it had to be after this year’s election.

Florida’s 67 county elections supervisors have proposed dramatic reforms, including replacing Election Day with 11 days of voting and doing away with voting precincts.

The plan calls for 11 days of voting, ending on the traditional Election Day.

“I think the voters spoke loud and clear in the general election of 2004 that they want other options than to be limited to 12 hours on a Tuesday to vote,” said Bill Cowles, president of the Florida State Association of Supervisors of Elections and the Orange County supervisor of elections. “We should seize upon the opportunity in 2005 to make the changes so we can try it in 2006.”

Better than nothing, I guess.

Updated: I left the link to the MSNBC story off yesterday, but I have added it now for more about the reform proposals.

Posted: 01 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier
Updated: 02 December 2004, Matthew Schlukebier

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